Quite a long time ago I came to realize that I was being in a human way. For me, this shift in perspective was profound. I stopped thinking of myself as a being and started thinking of myself as simply being. As I expressed it at the time, I am not a noun; I am a verb. A happening. I began to think of all that is in this same way, as simply being.
Over the years, I have spent much of my reflective life allowing this single realization to evolve, being guided by my meditation, being influenced by what I read, testing it at each of its turns. There were many iterations, each building on its predecessors. Words and structure changed. I was progressing toward something, of this I was sure. Many times I thought I was close, almost there… then realized I was not there, if indeed there were a there. The process continued. Without end it seemed. I was at ease with that. I kept going to be going.
A few years ago I did arrive at three central, definitive conclusions. I was being. I was being in different ways. I was being in these different ways at the same time. “The same time” is a moment, as it turns out. At that point I knew my core belief was in place, though it remained for nuances to emerge. That process continued for a good while longer until… until about a year ago in the fall of 2020. Time passed. Nothing new surfaced. No changes. As always, I recited my belief day after day, night after night, into the passing weeks and months. Nothing new surfaced, no changes… it is as it is.
there is not a plan
(just being only being)
no plan with purpose
(just being only being)
no destination
(just being only being)
no path to follow
or plan or journey, what then...
then there is being
first, there is being
being in a human way
brain and circumstance
bring perceptions, thoughts, concepts
needs, wants, and feelings
bring senses, memories, and
they bring attachments
are the way of this, of that
this is the first way
in the same moment
the second way of being
an awakened way
bearing witness to being
in a human way
the awareness of first way
brain and circumstance
of perceptions, thoughts, concepts
needs, wants, and feelings
of senses and memories
and of attachments
of this and the way of that
thus the second way
in the same moment
yet a third way of being
a way that transcends
transcending all other ways
yet coexistent
the one eternal moment
while living in time
meditation never far
being in present
moored within…a new freedom
freedom to be free
an eternity of now
freedom found at last
freed from conceptual thought
freed from attachment
a life of contemplation
or zazen perhaps
free from conceptual thought
call it emptiness
three ways are woven
into a way of living
called A Life of One
human way, awakened way
way of emptiness
oneness in timeless moment
one being moment
being love
being kindness
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